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Christmas can be a difficult time for single parent and blended families. Trying to come to an agreement on where children will be and when, let alone where Santa will deliver presents, can cause otherwise amicable arrangements to fall apart.

Divorce lawyers, Centrelink/Child Support Agency, counselling services and helplines all report a flurry of activity at Christmas – most of it distressing for all parties. It’s also a time when domestic violence increases along with all other stresses.

There are lots of tips on how to handle things, as well as other people’s experiences to draw on, with the most often cited one being to let go of your expectations and start developing new traditions. Have a look at these pages for some tips:

Divorce Support – Tips for Surviving Christmas as a Divorced Parent

Family Lives – Top ten tips for separated parents at Christmas

Dr Ruth – Holiday Tips for Divorced Parents

Most of these tips depend on parents being able to talk with each other, and focus on their children when making arrangements. While of course it’s better if you can do that, we all know that sometimes that doesn’t happen. If you can’t talk with each other, then you might need to be more stringent in your arrangements.

While there are lots of tips for dads on how to cope without your kids at Christmas, either parent can be the one on their own. If you don’t have your children with you on Christmas day, things can be particularly upsetting, and making a break with tradition can be even more important in helping you cope.

And if it’s that difficult at Christmas when there’s only one set of kids and parents to organise, what happens when you become a blended family, with children, step children, step-children’s other siblings, and maybe two or more sets of parents (not to mention all those grandparents) what do you do? Given the rate of separation and remarriage, this is becoming increasingly more common. There are some great stories – as well as some heartbreaking ones – on how to cope.

So Merry Christmas and happy holidays to everybody. I hope whatever you are doing brings you and your children great happiness.

Some useful numbers if you you need to talk with someone:

Lifeline: 13 11 44

Kids Helpline : 1800 55 1800

Mensline : 1300 789 978

Domestic violence line : 1800 656 463